This has got to be one of the stupidest things I have ever written. I hope you enjoy it though.

Day one, 2:05 p.m.

A fourteen-year-old boy wearing 2 handfuls of 25cent egg toy rings walks into the classroom. His name is Slade, a monotone pacifist that can turn the exact opposite in the presence of his friends.

Slade: Word up Whiggas. ::His rings glisten while his trench coat blows in the draft from the open window.::

A friend of Slade’s stares indifferently, wearing a collared shirt tucked into khaki pants.

Naoki: What was that? Oh, and what’s with the bike chain?

A chain falls to the floor, which obviously served as Slade’s belt.

Slade: Haven’t I told you? I’m revamping my personahh, so that these phoolz quit thinking of me as a devil worshipper. Some idiot asked me if I was going to kill my Computer class for wearing my trench coat to school. It blew my mind beyond Recognition.

Naoki: Well, you’re being stupid… so leave your façade at home.

Slade (who is offended): True dat, yo. ::He walks out, into the hallway, and boards his school bus.

Later that day in Slade’s home 4:30 p.m.

The doorbell rings. Slade closes his Geometry book along with his notebook and unchains the door. A teenage male is on the other side, wearing an NGE t-shirt and black baggy jeans.

David: Sup yo.

Slade: What up?

David: Yo, I’m going to the mall to blow some minds, you wanna come?

Slade: Aight, let me call Naoki and see if he wants to meet us there. How we gonna blow them minds?

David: Standard procedures, run up the down escalator, and meaningless/pointless things.

Slade: Ok, Naoki is gonna meet us there. Let’s bounce, yo.

Slade walks out of the door and they walk to the mall, through grass that is not supposed to be walked on. Slade reattaches his ghetto belt and puts his shooting goggles on.

End OF Chapter One

Day One, 5:30 p.m.

Slade and David enter the pitiful excuse for a mall arcade and wait at the DDR machine for Naoki to arrive.

Slade: This is going to be splendid.

David: Where the Hell is that looser?

Naoki enters the arcade and puts his money into the Arctic Thunder machine. David and Slade approach him. Naoki glances over to them and resumes his game.

David: It took you long enough punk. We can barely recognize you in those clothes.

Naoki removes his Cowboy hat and buttons his long sleeve denim jacket (no shirt beneath it)

Naoki: I thought that we were planning to go incognito.

Slade: … No need for that, we’re not doing anything THAT crazy tonight.

David: You look like a pimp… only not.

Naoki rolls his eyes and puts his purple hat back on. Slade and the gang return to the DDR machine. Naoki realizes that he wouldn’t be safe tonight.

Food Court, 6:00 p.m.

Slade: Let’s get down to business. Seriously, just what are we going to do?

Slade picks at his fried rice while David is shoving pizza down his throat, and Naoki is slowly digesting his French Fries. David then stands up, with his stale pizza crust in his hand.

Naoki: Please, don’t do it, I’ll pay you.

David disregards Naoki’s offer and throws the bread at a random person. He knocks the table over, and the group dashes back to the arcade.

Naoki: Why we coming back here?

David: Because Slade doesn’t know how to write a fic.

Slade: … Will you go out with me?

David: WTF are you? Gay?

Slade is actually says this to a random girl. He knees David’s stomach, and continues to talk to the girl on the DDR machine.

Slade: So, what’s your name?

Rachel: Rachel

Slade: Yeah, so if I AA a cata, then you owe your life to me.

Rachel: That is my only purpose, To serve the DDR master, I am the DDR Bride.

Slade: Get ready to marry me, yo.

Slade picks Matsuri Japan, and sure enough, he AA’s it. David and Alez stare in awew.

Rachel: Master…

End of Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Arcade, 6:45 p.m.

A voice comes down from the ceiling. Slade, Naoki, and David look up. They see nobody, but they feel a strange wind envelope them. Slade turns completely turns around, and notices that the lights went out, and Rachel is the only one in the arcade. Slade looks up again, and sees a man balancing on the catwalk.

Slade: Rachel…

Ciel: How dare you take her away from me? I am Ciel, the only man to has ever survived the DDR duels. Rachel is rightfully mine. ::Glances at Rachel, who quickly directs her attention to the floor:: Slade, I challenge you to a duel, if you do not accept, then Rachel is mine… If you lose, then I will kill you.

Slade: Biznitch, I’m going to teach you a lesson. Rachel is not an object, but a living person.
Ciel: You fool! She is bound to the DDR master, that is her only purpose. ::He bends over and picks up a duffel bag and plunges to the floor. He takes the following out of the bag: Two swords, two scarves, one red and one black (7ft. long) and two rings which have an arrow engraved on them.:: Its simple, really. I put on a ring, you put on a ring, I put on a scarf, and you do the same. Each time you miss a step, your ring will shock you, and your scarf will tighten. Take off the ring, and the effects will end, however removing the ring admits defeat. Thus, resulting in a loss. Each duel consists of 3 songs, and the arrows are invisible. If you can keep your ring on, the winner is the man with the highest score. If, for some odd reason, we tie, then we will simply fight to the death. The swords are used to make the opponent miss dance steps. Do you understand, Slade?

Slade: Hai! But I pick the first song. Agreed?

Ciel: Right.

Slade walks up to the 5th mix, and picks Naoki. He presses the left select, right select, and start button to switch the song list to alphabetical. He decides to play Xanadu
On basic. He puts little on, and Ciel does the same.

Ciel: HA! Is this the best you’ve got?

Slade: Hardly, I’ve just gotta get warmed up first. ::He looks into Ciel’s purple and gold eyes and pushes the start button. Ciel tightens his black scarf and raises his wooden sword into high stance.::

Ciel: I’ll teach you to not mess with the Gods. ::Slade rolls his eyes and steps to the beat of the song as he brings his sword down on Ciel. Ciel struggles to regain his balance, but he falls off of the dancing stage. 4 arrows pass and Ciel begins to choke as smoke raises off of his fingers. The stench is unbearable.::

Slade: It ends here, cronie. ::He throws his sword at Ciel, but it is deflected back at him. Unfortunately, it hits Slade’s windpipe and he is forced to the ground, struggling to breath. Several arrows go by, but Slade manages to press the arrows with his sword. The song ends and Slade wins the match by 1000 points.

Slade: Ready for the next song?

End of Chapter 3

Naoki: What? Where did Slade run off to?

David: Hell, if I know.

Naoki grins.

Naoki: I’m serious; don’t you care about him?

David: Yeah, but it serves ‘em right for kicking me, yo. Man, that was weird.

David looks around and realizes that they’re not in the arcade anymore. Naoki scans the room, only to find a humongous, soft, silver couch. David strolls up to it and he plops down.

David: Comfy.

Naoki: Scoot over.

David lies down and claims the couch for himself. Naoki decides to sit on his face and David gags.

David: Phool.

An unwelcoming voice emanates from the black walls.

Voice: I didn’t expect Slade’s lackeys to be so… so… human. He deserves much better.

David launches a volley of profanity at the wall.

Voice: Ho-ho-ho! We’ll find out soon enough…

Realm of DDR, 7:00 p.m.

Ciel: Let it rip.

Ciel scrolls through the list, only to pick B4U Glorious style.

Slade: No FAIR!! You didn’t tell me we could pick long songs!

Ciel: Not fair eh? ::Ciel turns shuffle on:: You’ll wish you’d never met Rachel.

Slade: You forget, B4U is my favorite song on this mix.

Ciel starts the song by letting the timer run out. Slade is worried, but he reassures himself by thinking of the crazy things that Rachel can do for him.

Slade: B B B B4U, Everybody Jam! ::Slade acts as if he truly knows the words. Ciel lets out a laugh, which was a mistake because Slade takes his blunder and makes him regret it.:: Phoolish “God.” ::Slade slips his shoes off and kicks them over to Ciel’s platform. The pair of Etnies cause Ciel to trip and hit the bar, which collapses because of the amount of energy transferred.

Ciel gasps for air; his scarf is almost tight enough to snap his neck, but he regains his bearings and goes for Slade’s face.

Slade: You stupid B… ::his voice is cut off in result of Ciel punching his stomach.::

It seems as if Ciel disregards the dancing and simply attacks Slade.

Slade: Ugh.. It’s mere ly a matt…er of time… BEFORE I KILL YOU!

Slade’s adrenaline causes him to lose sight of pain and drives him to attack Ciel.

Slade: It ends here!! ::Slade grabs Ciel’s medium length hair and knees his face repeatedly.::

Ciel’s eyes widen and a mix of blood and sweat stain the pad.

Ciel: (struggling to breath) Can you be the one?

Slade: If you believe it, then it must be so. Bow to my feet and beg for my forgiveness! I may decide to spare your life.

Ciel: Imbecile, you are only doing damage to yourself by threatening me! I am the true victor!

Slade’s air supply is completely cut off and he feels the pain as his adrenaline wears off. Ciel is futilely pulling at his scarf, trying to mend the oxygen flow. Slade dances some more, slowly filling his groove meter and thusly his scarf is loosened. He picks up his wooden sword.

Slade, in harmony with the game: Jam Jam Jam DDR, everybody let’s get down. ::Slade thrusts downward, and cracks Ciel’s platform. This is queer because the sword did not make contact with the pad. Ciel pulls off his ring and gasps for air. He laughs as though its nothing but a lame joke::

Ciel: How can this be? ::He stares at the broken stage as his face drips blood onto the floor.::

End of Chapter 4

Chapter 3

Slade: Now… bring my friends here, or die!

Ciel: Never.
Slade crosses his arms into an x shape, un-balls his fists, and places his hands onto Ciels face.

Slade: Drop the bomb. ::Slade whispers and his hands grow a pink aura. Music emanates from his hands and the volume, as well as the bass, increases. Ciel’s ears explode and cover Slade in blood. Slade smiles, grabs Ciel by the lower regions, and slams him into the Korean 3rd mix. Rachel shows no emotion whatsoever and begins to play DDR::

Slade: Rachel, bring my friends here.

Rachel: It cannot be done. But I will bring you to your world, and send for them.

Slade: Agreed.

The same wind envelopes them and Slade returns to the arcade.

Slade: Now, where the Hell are my homies?

Slade sits on the DDR bar, but a large man asks if he can play. Slade says yes and puts some money in.

Man: How long have you been playing?

Slade: A year, maybe two… you any good?

Man: You’ll see. ::He takes his sandals of, which disgusts Slade because his nails are yellow and black.:: Fool,your friends are never coming back.

Slade: You fiend! ::pulls out his .9mm:: Suck on this wire beyatch!

Slade shoots the down arrow that the heathen is standing on. He screams as electricity fries his mind.

Ciel: Slade, I am not dead! I am only cool. You must die.

Ciel drops down from the light fixture as the arcade patrons run in fright or transform into countless numbers of Rage. (a selectable DDR character)

Whiga, I’ma pop yo capillaries like there’s no tomorrow. Eat my lead pagan. He shoots Ciel. Every bullet paints the floor and walls red, but Ciel shows no suffering.

Ciel: You cannot defeat me unless you go to the whitehouse and obtain the crazy jewel of mind blowing.

Slade: You are the fool, Ciel.
Slade pulls the gem out of his pocket and throws knives at Ciel. All of them miss, but stick to the wall in the shape of an inverted pentagram.

Slade: You shall dishonor your family name, Ciel.

Slade’s gun transforms into an AK-47 and he wreaks havoc on Ciel. Blood, guts, brains-everything- splatter onto the floor.

Slade: I am victorious once again. Now, to take care of these DDR freaks.

Rage: Nu nu nu nu!

A Rage clone attacks from Slade’s backside. Slade falls to his knees.

Slade: ::gasping:: You… are the.. Antithesis… of cool… (blackout)

THE END!!!
Thanks to all that have made this work of fiction possible. Thanks to DDR and Naoki. Thanks to KOA and Slade’s mind-blowing alternate reality.
Your reading skillz bring tears to my eyes! Like sunshine on a cloudy day!
Thank you, readers!!!